In life we can become really stuck when we don’t accept our past. Without acceptance of the past we can’t find peace in our hearts in the present moment. Rather, we become stuck in a restlessness that we can’t escape. An overall dissatisfaction of our circumstances, which is our “life situation.”

We all have a story about our specific life situation, for worse or for better.

Are you stuck in regret? Are you dwelling on what happened? Are you not accepting where your life is NOW?

If so, this is for you friend.

look. up.

In the mist of the pain and disappointment of how you wished it to be: Look up. look up and pay attention to what’s going on around you. If you could look up there’s something to be seen beyond the failed expectation. There’s something to be seen beyond the past.

In the present moment is where there’s peace if you learn how to truly BE in this moment now.

that’s the gift.

that’s the practice.

that’s the way to end the pain of what was and the fear of what’s to come.

But how do you get there? How do you become more present?

look up. notice. observe. take the present in. (I know, it sounds so simple), however with so much noise and distraction it can become a bad habit to live in our minds and not the current moment.

We suffer greatly without looking up; feeling trapped in our own self imposed prisons.

Living in the past or future will leave us unfulfilled in the present. Focusing on what “didn’t” happen will trap us in sadness. Focusing on what we wish would happen, but is not happening, brings frustration and a lack of hope to our hearts.

In this state, we become all consumed by the lost dream. Will the dream ever happen? With our doubt heavy on our shoulders, our hope begins to fade.

In this mindset, our heads are down, we just want to get through it. We go from task to task mindlessly. We can’t see anything but the problem. the crisis. the pain.

Is it over yet ? Are we there yet?

if i don’t think about it, it will go away. If i distract myself, I will feel better. these are lies.

Ignoring and avoiding can become habits to cope and deal with the hardships in life. We avoid via many different means, but mainly it’s an over doing of something. Too much of anything becomes a problem. A coping. A means to escape our current pain.

Too much exercise. Too much eating. Too much drinking. Too many plans. Too much shopping. and so the list goes.

What’s your “too much?”

Finding solace in our vices can become our dirty habit. We can begin to embrace this way as a lifestyle. We become sick when we do this. Sick in our bodies and our minds.

we rush. we live our days with our head down. we morn the future that we thought we would and should have. All the while, making the present the monster that we see it to be.

It’s not how it should be. It’s a nightmare. A disaster. Wrong. What’s the point?

this perpetuates our head down, half empty position in life and so we go…continuing to spend our days looking down. Wishing it could be better. Feeling like it will never get better….. and so it goes.

the. shift.

The current situation will morph and shift and change. It’s impermanent. Life is forever changing.

Even amongst hardship and in difficult moments, there are things going on around you that could lift you up, make you smile, or at the very least, get you out of your head for a moment of relief. One moment at a time, with a focus on each unique moment of “light,” of presence, things have the chance to turn around.

Finding peace in the present begins to create peace in your future. Momentum does wonders. What we focus on grows.

The current situation doesn’t need to change to find relief.

Your “life situation” is different from your life in this moment. In this moment ask : “Is there anything wrong?” (the answer is actually NO, I know this is really hard to wrap our heads around) In this moment there is nothing wrong.

This is not to take away from the pain that you are feeling because of the things that are happening, however NOW is not the past nor the future. It’s NOW. It’s where we can form a new idea about what happened or what may come. The present is where we can all find relief. No matter what our life situation looks like.

The relief is found within the focus on the NOW. The present moment.

it might be a struggle to do this. it might feel hard. it can feel impossible. i hear you.

How can i focus on now? What does that even look like? How can I ever feel relief from my problems and get "present” when I’m so bothered?

Your belief and commitment toward building a practice to come more into the present moment is where it begins. That’s what meditation is. That’s what “focusing on the present” means. Relief is within such practices and within the space of RIGHT NOW.

One moment at a time, one minute at a time, one day at a time. with practice, and a commitment to “trying” to see it different, things can shift for you.

Energy flows where attention goes……

for you:

this might be a practice of breath work. this might be a meditation practice. this might mean time in nature. this might mean a spiritual practice. this might mean changing negative lifestyle habits. this is for you to discover.

What practice do you think you need to bring in to become more present?

PRESENCE: it’s in noticing the small moments….

the bird chirping. a child laughing. a couple embracing. a woman smiling. two men conversing. the clouds passing. the wind blowing. the leaves falling. the sun shining. the ocean roaring.

life. happening. now.

life happening in the present.

training our minds to BE HERE vs. THERE is a shift that can do us great wonder. There’s hope. There’s light. There’s the present. Sometimes, if you’ve had your head down for too long, you will struggle to believe that this is so.

The truth is that there is light. One moment at a time of light.

I point you to focus toward the light. However small it is; embrace it. Give it your attention and your energy. Get curious about it. engage with it. Be with it. For it won’t lead you wrong.

look. up.

cheers friends. much love. kim.

*Above image was taken by Photographer Paige Nelson @villapalomajoshuatree.

Blog | Licensed Therapist | Self Discovery | North County San Diego, CA